When You’ve Fallen Down, Take Your Time

We have all heard the adage, “when you fall down, get back up.” Conventional wisdom tells us to always get back up on the horse. And while this advice is universally accepted as encouraging and helpful; for many of us, this generic advice only makes us feel worse about our predicament.

As someone who works with people trying to lose weight and achieve balance for a living; and as someone myself who is going through his own journey, I understand this issue all too well.

When you’ve fallen down again and again and again, time after time, despite changes, despite doing inner-work, despite yet another breakthrough— when you’re on the floor or at rock bottom again, we become less motivated to get back up.

We think, “what’s the point?” If I get up, I’ll just fall back down again.

Lately I fell into a similar slump; everything was going so well and I was feeling wonderful. Then, a series of stressful events hit me so hard, that I froze, and struggled to get back up.

I always tell people that your health is only as strong as your foundation. I discovered my once strong foundation was weak and falling apart. When the stressors came; they opened up deeper wounds and deeper issues. But this time I did what I’ve never done before.

I let myself stay down. I took my time.

I allowed myself to read the entire Harry Potter series for the fifth time. I let myself binge watch my favorite Netflix series. I said yes to the pizza and yes to fun plans. I allowed my existential crises to wash over me. I talked to my coaches and therapist. I had late night phone calls with old friends and my family.

I didn’t set any expectation for myself to get back into my routine or follow through on the things I felt pressured to do. Instead, I did the bare minimum. I took nature walks instead of running. I checked on finances when I needed to. I wrote when I felt motivated. I cleared my schedule and devoted time to filling my cup and allowing myself to completely feel everything I was feeling.

When you give yourself time; something amazing happens:

You start to realize how strong you are. You begin to see an inner strength come as a result of your willingness to bear the unbearable.

And then, getting back up doesn’t seem so hard. The inspiration to get back on your feet comes to you and instead of dread or apathy; you feel ready. Ready to face the world again.

Getting back on my feet has been a journey. I won’t say that I’ve enjoyed every moment of it; in fact many aspects have been very painful. But looking back on the past few weeks; I’m really grateful for everything that’s happened. Here’s why:

I am moving forward more sure of myself, more motivated and with an inner-strength that will lay the foundation for this next phase of my life.

Thank for being part of it.